Sunday 6 November 2011

It's Been One Week...

Only, it hasn't, it has been 3.

3 weeks makes my total of another 45.6 miles walked sound impressive.  182.8 miles completed now with 317.2 to go for me to meet my 500 mile target.
You know what I am going to say though don't you?  Yes, cycling is not going so well.  I have a measly 5 miles to add to my total.  37.5 miles completed leaving a lot still to go.

Since my brain haemorrhage I have been under the weather for a great proportion of the time.  I am completing the walking (which looking at the figure is still less than half of what I was doing pre haem) because I have to get the girls to and from school and myself to and from medical appointments.  So basically if I HAVE to I will. The problem is I am normally so utterly exhausted from the exertion and the concentrating on not getting myself run over by falling off the curb/not realising that car is actually moving - towards ME and in so much pain in the fooked feet - that I get home and collapse in a heap at home.  For hours.

I find decision making, however simple a challenge now.  So deciding to move off the sofa is hard enough never mind get the bike out.  I have apathy, no really, it is a recognised post brain buggery condition.  Motivation is a struggle, but..

I am not giving up, but I think I am taking the pressure off myself a bit.  Especially as over the next few weeks I will complete about 8 different assessments to determine what and where any damage to my noggin is.  I have also decided to be sterilised (I did discuss it with my husband and doctor first).  I can't say I am relishing the thought of another operation, but a weeks recovery is far better than the alternatives for many and varied reasons.

And I would rather be a bit smaller before I have an operation on my wibbly middle.  (My weight is yo-yoing because there is also a question mark of whether I have PCOS, well, why the hell not?  I am collecting medical conditions for the hell of it now.)  So I have an equally compelling reason to keep trying to push myself just a bit with the exercise as I do to stay curled up on the sofa.

I'll keep trying, this is an inspirational volleyball quote apparently but it is true anyway:

10 comments:

  1. *hugs* fee. keep going! you are amazing,you can do this :) sorry to hear about the PCOS possibility,though if you have it you can join my exclusive club. we have shagpile carpet and everything! v plush. its not a huge deal really, you have kicked the ass of much worse xxx

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  2. Thank you :-)
    I am OK with it, I have had my children at least so I am lucky. The GP thinks it is either that or I am not handling the implant anymore, I never get on with extra hormones for very long!

    Anyway, while being sterilised will probably bring back several other 'ladies problems' it will also ensure I can't get pregnant again. The medical profession is as terrified as I am of further pregnancies :-)

    I like shagpile carpet! xx

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  3. Ah, I see. Yeah, the main problem I have with it is never known if I am preggo or if it's even possible. So sterilisation will remove that anxiety for you! If I had the guts I'd do it too tbh, but am too young :).

    Hormones are a bitch. xxx

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  4. It must be so hard Franco :(

    The GP agrees the risks with an accidental pregnancy are too high now. I'd already been warned against more children before my head exploded too.

    I am concerned about having keyhole surgery on the fattiest bit of me though, it does increase the risk and I don't want them to have to abandon the op or have to open me up. Am thinking of including a lot more soup in my diet. Even I can normally manage to heat soup without too many injuries! I figure it is probably better (and cheaper) than a slim fast quick fix!

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  5. Oh deffo. And soup is yummy! I looked at the boots own brand slimfast thing the other day (don't ask) and nearly keeled over at the cost. I'm not paying that much to be hungry!

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  6. Exactly my thoughts, plus it all tastes so synthetic. I considered it before for convenience as unless I have already decided what to eat I can't decide when I am home alone.
    But I might as well have a milkyway and a bowl of soup, same sort of calories but tastes normal!

    So thinking I'll actually remember to have breakfast, either porridge or a slice of toast. Soup for lunch and a nice balanced dinner... or something. I am through the Snicker fixation now at least...

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  7. Good plan. 2 oatcakes (rough is better) might fill you up more than 1 slice of toast, if you want a bit of variety. That's what I choose between mostly. Except I have 2 slices, oops. Soup for lunch is ace, especially chunky or noodly :)

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  8. I am trying to perfe:Pct my oatcake recipe, might have another tinker

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    ReplyDelete