Sunday, 6 November 2011

It's Been One Week...

Only, it hasn't, it has been 3.

3 weeks makes my total of another 45.6 miles walked sound impressive.  182.8 miles completed now with 317.2 to go for me to meet my 500 mile target.
You know what I am going to say though don't you?  Yes, cycling is not going so well.  I have a measly 5 miles to add to my total.  37.5 miles completed leaving a lot still to go.

Since my brain haemorrhage I have been under the weather for a great proportion of the time.  I am completing the walking (which looking at the figure is still less than half of what I was doing pre haem) because I have to get the girls to and from school and myself to and from medical appointments.  So basically if I HAVE to I will. The problem is I am normally so utterly exhausted from the exertion and the concentrating on not getting myself run over by falling off the curb/not realising that car is actually moving - towards ME and in so much pain in the fooked feet - that I get home and collapse in a heap at home.  For hours.

I find decision making, however simple a challenge now.  So deciding to move off the sofa is hard enough never mind get the bike out.  I have apathy, no really, it is a recognised post brain buggery condition.  Motivation is a struggle, but..

I am not giving up, but I think I am taking the pressure off myself a bit.  Especially as over the next few weeks I will complete about 8 different assessments to determine what and where any damage to my noggin is.  I have also decided to be sterilised (I did discuss it with my husband and doctor first).  I can't say I am relishing the thought of another operation, but a weeks recovery is far better than the alternatives for many and varied reasons.

And I would rather be a bit smaller before I have an operation on my wibbly middle.  (My weight is yo-yoing because there is also a question mark of whether I have PCOS, well, why the hell not?  I am collecting medical conditions for the hell of it now.)  So I have an equally compelling reason to keep trying to push myself just a bit with the exercise as I do to stay curled up on the sofa.

I'll keep trying, this is an inspirational volleyball quote apparently but it is true anyway:


  1. *hugs* fee. keep going! you are amazing,you can do this :) sorry to hear about the PCOS possibility,though if you have it you can join my exclusive club. we have shagpile carpet and everything! v plush. its not a huge deal really, you have kicked the ass of much worse xxx

  2. Thank you :-)
    I am OK with it, I have had my children at least so I am lucky. The GP thinks it is either that or I am not handling the implant anymore, I never get on with extra hormones for very long!

    Anyway, while being sterilised will probably bring back several other 'ladies problems' it will also ensure I can't get pregnant again. The medical profession is as terrified as I am of further pregnancies :-)

    I like shagpile carpet! xx

  3. Ah, I see. Yeah, the main problem I have with it is never known if I am preggo or if it's even possible. So sterilisation will remove that anxiety for you! If I had the guts I'd do it too tbh, but am too young :).

    Hormones are a bitch. xxx

  4. It must be so hard Franco :(

    The GP agrees the risks with an accidental pregnancy are too high now. I'd already been warned against more children before my head exploded too.

    I am concerned about having keyhole surgery on the fattiest bit of me though, it does increase the risk and I don't want them to have to abandon the op or have to open me up. Am thinking of including a lot more soup in my diet. Even I can normally manage to heat soup without too many injuries! I figure it is probably better (and cheaper) than a slim fast quick fix!

  5. Oh deffo. And soup is yummy! I looked at the boots own brand slimfast thing the other day (don't ask) and nearly keeled over at the cost. I'm not paying that much to be hungry!

  6. Exactly my thoughts, plus it all tastes so synthetic. I considered it before for convenience as unless I have already decided what to eat I can't decide when I am home alone.
    But I might as well have a milkyway and a bowl of soup, same sort of calories but tastes normal!

    So thinking I'll actually remember to have breakfast, either porridge or a slice of toast. Soup for lunch and a nice balanced dinner... or something. I am through the Snicker fixation now at least...

  7. Good plan. 2 oatcakes (rough is better) might fill you up more than 1 slice of toast, if you want a bit of variety. That's what I choose between mostly. Except I have 2 slices, oops. Soup for lunch is ace, especially chunky or noodly :)

  8. I am trying to perfe:Pct my oatcake recipe, might have another tinker

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